I demand satisfaction (or "Duals are hard work". Pun intended.).

So I've come to the sobering realization that I do desperately need a second job. Sigh. That's gonna require me to go a'huntin for jobs again. It's also gonna mean that, once I get said job, I'll have less free time to laze about, jerk off, and otherwise waste my time blissfully.

It's funny--that's actually among my biggest causes for apprehension. I guard my free time like some paranoiac; it's mine, it's my right. But besides that, I so often find myself tired and worn out and burning out on my one job, so how the fuck am I gonna do a second job?!

It's kinda like before, too, where I was scared to get my (current) job because I was so scared of failing. Here, I already have a job, it causes me stress and fatigue, so now I'm worried that not only will I struggle at the second job, but that its added stress & fatigue will fuck me over at the first and second job. :\

All the same, it should be noted that in becoming less wholly and desperately dependent on my one, singular job, that it'll probably take off much of the pressure. It might actually be fun again.

Imagine that.

Also, whether I like it or not, I really have no choice: I have a lot of loan payments to make and I'm just not making them.

Sigh. Why does life have to be so demanding?

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