So, two days into the new year and finally bothering to work out some resolutions. And ya wanna know why? Because everyone else is doing it.
As I mentioned yesterday, I kind of forgot about New Year's...so it shouldn't surprise anyone that I didn't do much preparation for this kinda post. You know, note cards of reflections and annals of resolutions, whittling them down to a pristine post of sublime art and form and....yeah. Not happening.
However, I'll still BS what I can in 30 odd minutes and see what happens. Actually I think it should turn out well. Let's find out:
So, since I haven't come up with much for the new year, let's take a minute to reflect on this past one. I've done a good bit of growing up in the last 6 months or so. Here's some of the shit I've learned.
I learned...
...I'm not as much of a fuck up as I'd expected. See, I put off getting a job as long as I did in part because I expected to be such a fuck up--about attendance and performance--that they'd fire me and thus it wasn't even worth applying. God forbid I get fired by Staples!!
As it turns out, not only can I be fairly consistently early to my shifts, but I can be one kickass employee, apparently. And I know it, ya know? Not out of smugness, but just feeling satisfied more often than not with a job well done. It's a nice feeling and it surprised me.
...trying my best goes a long way. See, as you mighta guessed, I often don't think highly of my competence. And even when I don't think I'm simply incapable, generally, I'll often still expect that I'm not not up to task in at least that moment; too tired or unfocused, obviously, to get it done properly. I'll give up before even trying.
But in the last couple months I came up with a new motto for myself--If I try my best, everything's gonna be okay. Something to that effect. It's born out well, actually; it works double duty to encourage me to try to the best of my ability regardless and also to soothe the ambient anxieties I have and too often give in to.
...trying at all goes a long way. This probably goes without saying, but I felt I should mention this lesson, too. I have a long, shameful habit of giving up or avoiding things, often without trying.
I learned, though, that doing something, even only a little, goes much, much farther than doing nothing would have. Besides getting an idea of the task itself and getting closer to completing it, there's also a sense of accomplishment where I'd have otherwise felt useless and pathetic. That means a lot to a self-defeating personality.
Anyway, I said 30 minutes, and I'm sticking to that; I gotta get to work and shit, folks. I was gonna write up some actual resolutions, but I think I'll think on them while I'm out and see what I've come up with by the time I get home.
So, until later, adieu!
As I mentioned yesterday, I kind of forgot about New Year's...so it shouldn't surprise anyone that I didn't do much preparation for this kinda post. You know, note cards of reflections and annals of resolutions, whittling them down to a pristine post of sublime art and form and....yeah. Not happening.
However, I'll still BS what I can in 30 odd minutes and see what happens. Actually I think it should turn out well. Let's find out:
So, since I haven't come up with much for the new year, let's take a minute to reflect on this past one. I've done a good bit of growing up in the last 6 months or so. Here's some of the shit I've learned.
I learned...
...I'm not as much of a fuck up as I'd expected. See, I put off getting a job as long as I did in part because I expected to be such a fuck up--about attendance and performance--that they'd fire me and thus it wasn't even worth applying. God forbid I get fired by Staples!!
As it turns out, not only can I be fairly consistently early to my shifts, but I can be one kickass employee, apparently. And I know it, ya know? Not out of smugness, but just feeling satisfied more often than not with a job well done. It's a nice feeling and it surprised me.
...trying my best goes a long way. See, as you mighta guessed, I often don't think highly of my competence. And even when I don't think I'm simply incapable, generally, I'll often still expect that I'm not not up to task in at least that moment; too tired or unfocused, obviously, to get it done properly. I'll give up before even trying.
But in the last couple months I came up with a new motto for myself--If I try my best, everything's gonna be okay. Something to that effect. It's born out well, actually; it works double duty to encourage me to try to the best of my ability regardless and also to soothe the ambient anxieties I have and too often give in to.
...trying at all goes a long way. This probably goes without saying, but I felt I should mention this lesson, too. I have a long, shameful habit of giving up or avoiding things, often without trying.
I learned, though, that doing something, even only a little, goes much, much farther than doing nothing would have. Besides getting an idea of the task itself and getting closer to completing it, there's also a sense of accomplishment where I'd have otherwise felt useless and pathetic. That means a lot to a self-defeating personality.
Anyway, I said 30 minutes, and I'm sticking to that; I gotta get to work and shit, folks. I was gonna write up some actual resolutions, but I think I'll think on them while I'm out and see what I've come up with by the time I get home.
So, until later, adieu!
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