palmerpink

No, not really, but I did have a blast last night and damn proud of it. Three friends and I hit up some gay joints in town and made a night of it. Wonderful times were had and friendships were deepened. Except with Parker, who was clearly too straight to be cool like the rest of us. Bitch wouldn't even fake dance. But we forgiae him because he's sweet. See, I don't normally do stuff like this. I'm secretly kind of shy and a bit timid. Like a lot a bit. But it's something I want to do more--go out with friends, mingle with queers, check out hotties, get my ass grabbed now and then by weirdos (and occasionally hotties). It's a good time and something I know I don't do enough of. So when my friend Matthew invited me out, I jumped at it. When I got Aaron and Parker on board, I got pretty stoked. Part of why I never go out like this is, as I said, that shyness and stuff; having friends to go with, people to feel comfortable around--it's what I need to get...

(Is that even the plural...? Oh well, too late; it's already written, and I've decided my ear thinks it's pretty.) I could write reams about how I feel when I see a hot guy. In fact, I know I have; there are embarrassing notebooks overly versifying the subject already--embarrassing not so much for raciness as, more often than not, lameness. Anyway, besides the more directly libidinal thrust a hot guy can put into normal daily rhythms, there's also those deeper effects and reflections. Prolly merely my usual overthinking, but sometimes it can't be helped. Today, there were two guys that got me off kilter like that. Damn them--for being hot and being frustrating! The first was some kinda nurse or doctor or dentist--he was in scrubs, let's leave it at that. He had blonde hair and sunlit eyes and a glorious smile. He came in looking for some cologne though wasn't too sure what as he hardly wears any. For all I knew he was 35 but damn if he wasn't th...

Yeah, I'm one of those guys who's never really been with someone around Valentine's. I am sometimes baffled how other people manage these things--and why I can't. To be fair, it's probably as much my not trying enough and trying too hard as it is anything pariticularly wrong with me. Like, I know I don't get myself out there enough to meet guys and when I do it's probably compensatory and usually flawed from the start. The other question is--why does it matter so much to me? Evidently it seems like something I want but something I'm scared of, too. It may also be something I'm just not very good at. I'm secretly timid and fearful of most confrontation and directness. For all my communication skills, I always seem to chicken out when it comes to talking to guys in a healthy, sustaining way. I'm a dreamer who wants something nice badly enough to stick to something for the concept of having it more than the reality of dealing with it; I want t...

Parker recently got a Nintendo DS--which I kept stealing to play Pokemon. Yes, at my age. You have to realize that I was  the go-to guy in 6th grade for all things Pokemon. I nearly got sucked back into my addiction back around 10th grade but then summer ended. This time...I don't know if I can/want to stop it......... XD Anyway, the obvious solution was to get me a DS of my own. You can imagine how frustrated it was making Parker finding his DS constantly missing. Yup, I was that dickish about it. So yesterday we traded in a PS2 and a buncha its games and some games for gamecube and also pawned an old Xbox and its games. We walked up to the GameStop clerk and the following conversation ensued: Me : We'd like to buy one of them pre-owned DS-lites for $80... Clerk : Okay...not a problem.....do you want any specific color or will anything--? Me : I want pink. Clerk : .....seriously? That's right, this is really happening. I have a pink DS-lite. And it looks lik...

Too cute. Not much more needs saying--I'll let the video speak for itself :P My friend Colin showed this to me; thanks, man!