palmerpink

I recently got to spend a few days at the lake house my family used to visit through most of my childhood; we no longer own it, and it turns out I missed it more deeply than I realized. Anthony and I both got the week before NYC Pride off this year, so I contrived to get us a little time there. The cousins who own Greenshore gave Anthony and me permission to relax there for several days rather than just the 1 or 2 I had expected. Good god, I'm grateful for that. I missed this place. Standing on the balcony, the porch, or the dock and looking out over the lake, I was reminded of the beauty and tranquility this lake represents for me. The meaning and memories, too. This was always a place of solace and stability for me. We moved around a lot when I was a kid, but we always came back to this place. It had been in our family for generations before I was even born—if we'd been able to keep it, it would have been a solid 4 generations including mine. This was where I figured ...

So I think I've mostly gotten April outta my system. Esp the bemoaning certain boys over 4 separate posts. Fingers crossed.... One good sign, though, is I wrote a sad poem the other night that had NOTHING to do with that guy I was all minces butthurt about. Seriously--wasn't even thinking of him. I was actually thinking of an old love of mine, who, as far as I know has been roughly where I have in terms of enduring troubles and accomplishing life goals. Anyway I recorded what snippets I had here on the Droid, so maybe next time I have my headphones and a pen I'll work on it some. It's gonna start with: Where have we gotten to with our lives? In these last twenty-four years, We must have been headed somewhere. With something like thissy too: It's hard to say where we lost our way Since I'm not sure we ever really had one. And end with something like: Contentment aside--I just want Something to hang on to, Someone to hold close, And somewhere to go. ...