Who searches for this shit?

I've posted about it before, but I love looking at my site's stats now and then. They're still woefully meager, but it's still funny to see what people were searching for when they found my blog. Besides being surprised that anyone would search for me/my blog (that's where most of my traffic seems to come from...), it's just plain weird imagining people who'd actually type some of these things into google and hit ENTER.

Three particularly odd search keywords things from the last month caught my eye this afternoon. I'll list them from most funny to most odd.

• angry crazy screaming insane woman

Seriously? Who the fuck searches for this? Like, sits down at the computer and says, "You know what? I wanna see an angry crazy screaming insane woman. Yeah, that's just what I wanna see right now."

I can't even stand when the woman at a table next to me tries to get bitchy with the server (I can't stand it when anyone tries to get bitchy with the server, mind you), nevermind ever actively seeking while I websurf.

Still though, it's kinda hilarious. It's so specific and redundant. I do know exactly what post they ended up on, that's easy enough. I just hope it's what they were looking for--cuz if they were eager to see a lady legitimately pissed off, something prolly ain't right with them.

• demand satisfaction

That's a bit odd, but kinda amusing. I can't even think of a post that'd answer that search query. Wait, it's that one?! I barely remember making that post.

Still, it's a hilarious phrase with some hilarious possibilities. Like, you're having sex and the other guy cums then says "Well, I'm done, see ya 'round" and you shout "I DEMAND SATISFACTION, SIR."

Good times to be had, obviously.

• facepalmer org bad high school acting

Oh god, someone found those tapes of high school plays I was in--!!! Or it's just coincidence. Prolly coincidence. Still scared me for a second--that shit prolly shouldn't see the light of day. Less because of my acting than the usually heinous awkwardness of the shows I was in. {shudder}

I do want to know why someone who was able to specify "facepalmer" so cleanly would want anything to do with bad high school acting. Like, were they hoping I'd have a funny post reviewing a local school's play? Is my site the first thing that comes to mind when they think "awfulness"??

I'm probably over thinking this again, but still. I demand satisfaction!