Skip to main content

Who searches for this shit?

I've posted about it before, but I love looking at my site's stats now and then. They're still woefully meager, but it's still funny to see what people were searching for when they found my blog. Besides being surprised that anyone would search for me/my blog (that's where most of my traffic seems to come from...), it's just plain weird imagining people who'd actually type some of these things into google and hit ENTER.

Three particularly odd search keywords things from the last month caught my eye this afternoon. I'll list them from most funny to most odd.

  • angry crazy screaming insane woman
Seriously? Who the fuck searches for this? Like, sits down at the computer and says, "You know what? I wanna see an angry crazy screaming insane woman. Yeah, that's just what I wanna see right now."

I can't even stand when the woman at a table next to me tries to get bitchy with the server (I can't stand it when anyone tries to get bitchy with the server, mind you), nevermind ever actively seeking while I websurf.

Still though, it's kinda hilarious. It's so specific and redundant. I do know exactly what post they ended up on, that's easy enough. I just hope it's what they were looking for--cuz if they were eager to see a lady legitimately pissed off, something prolly ain't right with them.
  • demand satisfaction
That's a bit odd, but kinda amusing. I can't even think of a post that'd answer that search query. Wait, it's that one?! I barely remember making that post.

Still, it's a hilarious phrase with some hilarious possibilities. Like, you're having sex and the other guy cums then says "Well, I'm done, see ya 'round" and you shout "I DEMAND SATISFACTION, SIR."

Good times to be had, obviously.
  • facepalmer org bad high school acting
Oh god, someone found those tapes of high school plays I was in--!!! Or it's just coincidence. Prolly coincidence. Still scared me for a second--that shit prolly shouldn't see the light of day. Less because of my acting than the usually heinous awkwardness of the shows I was in. {shudder}

I do want to know why someone who was able to specify "facepalmer" so cleanly would want anything to do with bad high school acting. Like, were they hoping I'd have a funny post reviewing a local school's play? Is my site the first thing that comes to mind when they think "awfulness"??

I'm probably over thinking this again, but still. I demand satisfaction!
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Or just tell me what you think.

Other things that might interest you...

On aging, and fear.

To begin with, I’m not sure you’re aware of it, but I’m middle aged. Oh? What gave it away? Using a blog as my primary literary medium?¹ Hm. But in fact, the APA defines 35 years as the end of “young adulthood.” Yeah. I found out via some shitpost on twitter when I was already 35, so it didn’t sit well with me then either. But my worries about aging began much sooner than that. See, even in my 20s, I feared I’d been wasting my life. I’d struggled with school and life and everything since graduating high school, arguably sooner, and nothing seemed to be going anywhere meaningful . I felt I had a limited social life, a dead-end job, no money, no great travels, a limping love life; I was, generally, a loser, wasting away... There were none of the usual hallmarks of success or happiness. And that scared me. Would my life have been worth it if I continued in this direction? Would it have been a “life well lived” by the end? So, this is my existential struggle. Even now, as I lurch ever nea...
Post a Comment
Read more

Changing lanes.

I was driving home in some traffic last night when I drifted, in my mind, a long way back (about 20 years) to high school. I was caught in one of those periodic traffic slowdowns as I floated back; you know, those waves of congestion that seem to pass backward through the columns of cars in each lane. (I've heard they start because someone switches lanes, and in response, a rippling emergent slowness travels backward and outward as the cars behind it accommodate the change, one by one.) What drew me back to those younger days was that, back in high school, similar phenomena of congestion took place in the halls between classes, when eddies of young humans would get caught in and around those clumps of those chatting by lockers or retrieving books. Occasionally, backups would occur when groups of people got caught in these eddies, or collided with other groups by the lockers, and slowdowns would ripple back from there. Maybe it's not exactly the same, but as I drove it seemed si...
Post a Comment
Read more

Oatmeal is tasty.

{slurps up berry-oatmeal-deliciousness} Indeed. I need to work on rebuilding a morning schedule. I can be zombie-like enough that I'll waste a perfectly good morning, and have often slept through many. And, really, it's such a useful time of day.
4 comments
Read more